My Mitu, mishy-mish, babloo turns 7...

Have you heard the Little Johnny joke
Little J: "Daddy, can you tell me what's sex?"
Dad thinks, he's gotta explain this someday, so now's a good time as any, even though Johnny may be a bit too young...
So he goes and explains all about the birds and the bees.
Little Johnny: 'But dad, how am I going to write all of that on this Application Form?"

That joke was the first thing that came to my mind after this incident -

We were all going on a drive, the girls playing and talking, which faded away in my chat with Pup when T1 showed her middle finger and asked me what it was...! Pup and I looked like we'd seen a ghost! We did NOT expect a question like that THIS early! Fortunately , I did not get into too much detail unlike the dad in the joke...
I said, "That's your middle finger..." and before I could ask why,
she acknowledged..."Oh, yeah..." and continued singing, "Where is Middle Finger, where is Middle Finger?..."

There was another time when she confessed to me that she used the "F" word...! Whaaat the f...?? She went on to say, "Amma, sorry I said it's not Fair"...

This little girl of mine always cracks us up with such punch-lines. Ever since she could start talking...

Here's another recent one -
T1: "Amma, you look like a teenager!"
Mommy does a triple somersault (in her mind, that is).
T1 Continues: "Ya, with the backpack on, you look just like a teenager!"

But right now, she desperately wants to "make up" jokes...Bless her heart, but she's terrible at it.

For example, she asks me, "Why is his name Sponge Bob Square Pants"?
Answer: "He's a square, he wears pants, his real name is Bob and he's a Sponge."
Dude, that is NOT a joke...

And she loves knock-knock jokes. She tries to come up with really, um...lame ones (as a mom it's really difficult to use "lame" for something that my daughter does). Sorry, but how do you let your darling daughter know that she should not try these things...? I even bought her a knock-knock joke book... She won't give up! She keeps trying. I keep telling her that she's naturally funny, and she doesn't have to make up jokes...
Let's hope she gets better at it someday!!

We recently took a trip down memory lane to look for photos to complete a "Timeline" project for her school. Such nostalgic memories...

Despite all those sleepless nights she gave us, her infantile eczema, the food allergies, her back-to-back-to-back ear infections and all other health issues she has had, T1 has been an amazing trooper and an even more amazing kid!

With her hormones that are going to kick in sooner or later (later, I hope), I do not know how her personality will change, but I am proud to say now that she is ONE amazing kid! It might sound cheesy to hear this from a parent, but it's true!
She's silly, she's funny, she's dramatic, she's SO mature, she's hard-working, she's silly and loves anything/anyone that's silly.

I can safely say that she's one heck of a kid all but 5% of the time - the only time that she devotes to being a typical 7 year old kid (even a 2 year old sometimes)...

All her teachers over the last three years have commented on her profound leadership qualities. She gets direct training everyday from being a big sis! She's taken this "big-sis" thing to a whole new level.
She loves to take care of her little sis. She reads to T2, she pets her, helps her with her MathWizard worksheets.
She even helps her brush her teeth on an occasional Sunday morning when mommy wants to sleep an extra 5 minutes...

The other day, Pup and her were picking up T2 from the daycare. She apparently asked T2's teacher if T2 ate well that day, what was it she ate, did she take too long, etc...

As a parent, I sometimes cringe when she dives in to teach other kids - whatever it is - drawing, singing, writing, counseling too sometimes - it comes across a bit ... well... "cringy"...
I hope we are on the right track in cultivating her leadership qualities and making sure she doesn't come across as obnoxious!

What else do we know about her?

She loves music. She loves to practice too...Both Carnatic vocal and Keyboard...
Except that I can't help her much in this dept...My cousin-B from whom she learns music aptly joked saying, "Unga rendu paerukkum paada varaathathukku sethu vechu iva paadara" - She has made up for the fact that neither of you can sing (me and Pup)
:B

She does get shy and moody every now and then when people ask her to sing, but for the most part she is ready to go into an infinite loop of songs. These days, T2 joins in too, so they can do a non-stop kutcheri, so beware before you ask her to sing :)

She *loves* to draw, color, paint...She can spend days together doing just that. She has done some nice stuff in her recent Art lessons - using strokes, shading, measuring, estimating size, etc...Most of what they do is copying the teacher's original art work, and in the process they learn to estimate proportions, they learn different shading patterns, etc...

Here's one that she drew of herself - copied from the work of a professional caricaturist. This has truly been one of my "Proud Mommy" moments!!



She's growing up so fast! It's amazing! It sucks! We've even started embarrassing her now with our baby talk and silly songs!

My mitu (as I love to call her) mishy-mish, babloo is another year (and two months) older...

Living with Food Allergies

This is part of the chain of posts to raise Food Allergy Awareness, started by Tara of Winkie's Ways.

T1 was barely a few days old when we noticed patches of dry, red skin caused by eczema. Our pediatrician, Dr.N suggested that we try and keep her skin as moist as possible with a topical application of Eucerin or Cetaphil. We did as we were told. But her eczema was only getting more rampant. That's when Dr.N suggested that I avoid milk, nuts and eggs, since I was exclusively nursing her. I did that. We did not see a dramatic difference, but I continued to follow the restrictions in my diet...
She also suggested we do a skin test to check for food allergies before starting solid food. There can be many causes for infantile eczema, food allergies being just one of those. In our case, that WAS the reason as we soon found out. When T1 was 7 months old, we did a comprehensive food test on her tiny back, since her arms were not big enough. She tested positive for Wheat, Oats, Potatoes, most Tree Nuts (including cashews, walnuts, almonds, hazelnuts and pecans) and Peanuts. We were naturally devastated as much as we were terrified.
Fortunately, she outgrew most of these (except nuts) by the time she was 2.

To-date, we are thankful to Dr.N for suggesting the test. With food allergies, the smartest thing to do is to stay away from the allergen as long as you can. Had we not tested and learned of her allergens, I am sure we would have made things worse for her. Especially with wheat! There is no way I'd have otherwise known to avoid wheat and oats!

Until we tested her, the eczema probably never got better because I'd been eating different forms of wheat when nursing her almost exclusively.
Sometimes I wonder if nursing her really helped her immune system, or if it made her immune system so powerful that it started treating even normal food as allergens, and basically making matters worse??!! Your two cents??

If an allergen triggers an anaphylactic reaction, it starts right away. But other symptoms including hives, rash, or stomach disturbances can start 2-3 days later. So, as much as we were excited to try out new foods, we waited and went by the book.
We were very, very, very particular when trying any new food. We started in small doses and continued for a whole week. No less!
As a matter of fact, we kept with this trend even after her first year. We had the food allergy results with us, so why did we do this? Because all of these food tests have false positives and false negatives. JA!!!
Usually, treenuts show better results with the skin test, peanuts with the blood test. Elimination and Re-introduction with careful supervision is probably a good way to test for food allergies.

We've learned a lot of things about managing food allergies and being on top of it. A lot of posts in this chain have listed a bunch of DOs and DONTs, and TIPS and TRICKS from Dottie, PG, Sue, Kiran, etc...
I have myself written a few posts on T1's allergies - here, here, and here.

So, for my part this time around, I'll primarily write about Reading Labels. While some Food Allergy labels are informative, some are very, very confusing and seem like they've been added as a "cover your a$$".
There are so many different variations of the same disclaimers. Some of the popular notes include -

"Manufactured in the same facility that uses nuts"
"Manufactured in shared equipment that uses nuts"
"May contain tree-nuts or peanuts"

"Manufactured in the same facility that uses nuts" makes a lot of sense because some people can have react to an allergen if it's "In the air."
So these folks have to really stay away from such products.

"Manufactured in shared equipment that uses nuts" is another of the informative messages that I did not know the real meaning for a long time. The possibility of contamination from shared equipment is exponentially more when they are "Dry-cleaned" as opposed to being rinsed with water.
If they are "dry-cleaned" there is a good possibility of nuts sticking in those unreachable corners. Especially Chocolate!! It may take a few batches to absorb all those remnant nuts before making totally nut-free chocolate. Ever since I learned that, I've completely stopped taking chances with chocolate.

In a FAAN meeting with Anne Munoz-Furlong (The founder and then CEO) as the Key-Speaker, she mentioned that if enough people call and request for nut-free chocolate, the manufactures will pay heed - apparently that's how you get disclaimer-free M&Ms in Canada!! The power of consumers!

"May contain tree-nuts or peanuts" is just too vague. If you've noticed, even Maggi has started adding these labels on! How frustrating! T1 loves Maggi, and I continue giving it to her, but I'm so scared and watchful each time. I should probably stop!
What's the deal with Trader Joe's?? As much as I love the store, I hate that they add these "You Can't Sue me Now" disclaimers! I mean from sandwiches to broth, their products May contain Shellfish and Nuts!!!
What next? Bagged spinach that May contain nuts?

I decided to keep a positive tone, and will stop my frutstration with labels at that!!
Oh, while I'm talking about Disclaimers, I'd like to add that this post is completely based on my experiences and to be taken with a pinch of salt (Hopefully we'll continue to find Salt with no nuts).
The other thing that I want to mention is being a member of an Allergy Network.
Being a part of my county's chapter of FAAN has helped us a lot. With regular meetings, we get to learn from other people's experiences. It's a good support group for each other. The founding members have worked VERY hard with the school board to stream-line rules and bring about a scripted "Health Plan." It's still in baby stages, but at least there is something in the works. We have had two amazing Halloween parties with completely safe food (aka none). They have also organized many play-groups, which I never had a chance to be a part of. But my point is that a support group like this has helped us in many ways. I learn something new every time I attend a meeting. There is a whole bunch of people who go through so much more than I do and have done it wonderfully so!

Finally, a note about treatments. There is no proven allopathic treatment on record. Yes, there are allergy shots for seasonal allergies, but they are so intrusive, and not even reliable! There are remedies that contain the symptoms, but nothing that really claims to cure - EXCEPT when you take the Alternative Route, that is!
Again, these are from my own experiences -
We have been treating T1 with BioSet for about 2 months now. As far as BioSet practitioners are concerned, they use intolerences and allergies interexchangably. The practitioners check the energy flow of any susbstance using its unique wavelength (Pup's Quantum Mechanics ken agrees with that logic). They sorta create a "circuit" using the substance they test against. If there is a block, the circuit is not complete. That's how they decide if must be treated.
Sounds far-fetched? We decided to try it nevertheless.
My niece, D took the treatment from the same doc and her Wheat allergies just went from +ve to -ve in a week, leaving her regular Allergist totally perplexed!! That's when I became a believer.

Both the test and the treatment are totally non-intrusive. All T1 has had to do is hold this metal rod wrapped in a wet paper-towel and chat away to glory for 15 minutes! Wait! The chatting away is nothing new to her!

We have so far attempted to treat outdoor allergens like mold, weed, pollen, trees etc. I do not know if this Fall's outdoor allergens were mild or if the treatment is working - but we haven't used a Nebulizer for T1 ALL season (Casting Anti-jinx Spells). She still has an itchy, runny nose...but nowhere close to what she endured last year!!
We've just started with foods this past week...
At the end of it, even if we do not have a cure for her food allergies, we are hoping that accidental exposures will not harm her much. That's good enough for us.

I'll end this note with this link to Dr.Sears' notes on Food Allergies.

Kumon, I bid thee adieu...

I'm really fed up of being the bad guy!
From the kids' point of view.
I want to have fun with the girls, not spend a good part of the 180 minutes that I get with them every evening asking them to "do this and that", or "NOT do this or that"!

The bad act from me starts soon after we get home and sit on the table to have their milk and snack. They longingly look at my neighbor's yard, which is a direct view from our dining room. My neighbor's daughter, M, and a couple of other new kids in the block are having fun playing in their swing or simply running around...while two little girls of this working mom are scurrying their snack down, and getting ready to start homework.

To ease my guilt, I can't help but wonder, "Didn't I just pick up T1 from her after-school care, where she spent close to 2 hours playing, even had some gymnastics lessons-which she LOVES!
Didn't I pick up T2 from the huge play-ground in her pre-school"?

Here's the problem - we have the whole thing reversed! Fun first, get home tired, THEN complete HW.

OK!! Here's our schedule -

5.00 - pick up kids and reach home
5.00-5.30 - quick wash-up, feed em a snack (start cooking dinner).
5.30-6.45 - Kumon and homework and music/keyboard practice.
6.45-7.30 - Dinner
7.30-8.00 - Brush, wash-up, read and get ready for bed.

As you can see, there is really no minute to spare. And most days, with the two of them goofing around and having fun (???) in between this schedule, bedtime ends up getting pushed to almost 8.30pm.
What difference will 30 minutes do, you ask?? It shows the next morning!! That's what. If they are in bed by 8.00, they are both well-rested and wake up by themselves or with little help. Else, it's a tough chore, esply with T2.

We're basically over-worked every single day and try as we may, there are hardly any real fun-family-moments! And did I add the cooking, cleaning, and a broken dishwasher that we haven't had the time to replace?

So What's gonna give?

Plan A: Kumon Reading!
Plan B: Kumon Math AND Reading!

As far as I know, NO Plan A has ever worked. So I'm not even going to try.

So, as of 15 minutes ago, Pup and I have agreed to stick to Plan B.
It's happening next week.
After tomorrow's Kumon Ceremony!
After she gets a Trophy each for Math and Reading.
For being ahead of her Grade Level.
For working SO DARN hard every single day, with complaints or without.
For putting on a bright happy face to make it less of a deal.
For talking to her mind (or brain as she says) and making it come around and cheer up when she's not willing to do Kumon.
For doing all of this because she blindly trusts us.

Freedom from Kumon!! Just saying it makes me feel de-stressed.
I think she deserves this freedom! We can do more fun things and still learn some math along the way.

And maybe she can even step out on a weekday to play with her our neighbor M.

Milk, Cows and an Address

In an attempt to make the girls think laterally, T1 mostly, I've been throwing random questions at them...
Mostly math questions for T1. She can do addition and multiplication quite well, but I don't know if she knows why or when to use them...Hence this exercise.
My most common application involves apples - adding them and dividing them for a said number of people.

Yesterday, I was following a book to ask questions and I tried to see if they remember something they had seen about a year or two ago in an episode of Little Einsteins.

So I asked, "What's Milky way?"
T1 said, "It's part of an address!!"
T2 Promptly answered, "What comes from cows, amma!!!"

Need I say more??

Need a break or I'll break!

You have NO idea how over-worked my mind is/ has been the past few weeks!
And it's about T1 starting Public School...

Why would this be SO different from her Kindergarten?
These were my thoughts before the open house and back to school nite...not in any particular order!
1. It's a totally new place.
2. It's much much bigger than her other school.
They prolly have to walk a mile each day getting from one class to another, to the cafetaria, the gym, the playground, etc...
(No, I am NOT complaining about the walking part, just trying to bring out the vastness of the school).
3. Completely new faces, from the teacher to her classmates, to the Principal...
4. Eating at the cafetaria. All I had to do last year was sit down with her, go over the veggie menu and let her pick the days she wanted us to buy from school. Then the teachers it served to them...
Now, on the other hand, she has to memorize her ID and use it on the key-pad if she were buying lunch
(At least we have the option to pre-pay, and she does not have to handle money...)
5. Logistics of how the heck am I going to get both kids ready by 7.20 and rush to the bus-stop!
(At that point, all I knew was an estimate of the bus-arrival time).
At least now, my in-laws are here and I can leave T2 home and drop T1 and come back, in the worst case...
But what happens after this month?? (T2 usually wakes up around 7.30...if it's 8.00 she loves it better)!
Just doesn't make sense for Pup to leave so late everyday...
Traffic's a b i t c h around here. Even 15 minutes make a huge difference for his already long commute, so 2hrs certainly will.
Also, I'd rather we spend more time together in the evening...
6. And if I have to make the mornings work, I have to get them to bed by 8.00! Which means I have to be up by 5.00 (if I have any intentions of continuing my already getting-fewer kapal bhatis).
And this also means dinner at 6.30 and start bed-time routine at 7.30. And somewhere in there squeeze in HWs and Kumon and 15-minute reading...
Talk about life-style change!
7. Travel changes for her - taking one bus to school in the morning, take another to after-care in the evening.
8. Not forgetting to bring back her backpack or her lunchbag or HW! (I was sure I'd have to buy at least 10 new lunch bags this year)...
Even the previous years, it's been her responsibility, but we picked her up from school, so we were able to check her bag and make sure everything was there...
9. New academic structure, new HW patterns, etc...
10.Her food and seasonal allergies, of course! This is prolly what has been my biggest cause for concern!
How much can I educate her? How can I bring every possible situation to her attention? Or even know what to tell her?
Everyone has been telling me how vocal she is and how she's going be fine...
But as true as it is, it is not really true! Does that even make sense?
She "can" be very vocal, if she is not distracted, that is! When she's with friends or other kids, she "completely" forgets all rules!
She does not stop to think, even though we have been re-iterating it to her more than we like.
I'm almost like a "thenja" tape - a worn-out tape - playing the rules over and over again. Until I actually see her in action following the rules, I will keep telling her the rules and will keep asking her to repeat after me!
- NO SHARING - NO accepting food from other kids even if you have eaten them before, you do not know if they had peanut butter -
- NO SHARING - Wash your hands before and after eating (let's hope the other kids do it too) - NO SHARING - NO SHARING - NO SHARING.

How the Back-to-School and Open-House Events changed some of my worries -
1. It won't be totally new to her now...She's seen the entrance, her classroom, teacher, classmates, and a little bit more of the building...
2. Is is much bigger than I thought it would be! Good heavens!!
3. At least she knows her teacher and the assistant teacher now by face...and a couple of classmates that she said hi to (and sad a bit that one kid did not say hi back :)
4. I found out that her school does not do a separate table for kids with allergies! sigh! they will be made to sit at one end of the table is all...
But the cafetaria folks will know that Tanvi has Nut Allergies.
There will be helpers the first week to help the kids use the keypad to buy their food.
5. Still an issue!!
6. Still an issue!!
7. Again, volunteers will be helping to guide children in and out of school.
Her after-care center had already contacted the school to make arrangements.
Her teacher made a note of each kids' PM arrangements for the first day, as well as every regular day...
That was the most important piece of info they collected from us.
May be I'll follow her school-bus and see if she gets in ok...and then again when school closes to see if she gets in the right after-care bus.
8. Still an issue!!
9. Lots of homework to come, lots of assessments to take place...
But, most often homeworks are going to be given out on Mondays and not due until Fridays.
We'll have time. Not so bad...
10.Talked to the principal, who was very accomodating and directed me to the School clinic Aide.
She switched T1's classroom to another where there were already 2 kids with Peanut Allergies.
That was thoughtful!
Met with the school Nurse/clinic Aide (whatever she's called...), handed in the necessary paper-work and Benadryl and Epipen (hoping that it never gets used, of course).
She said the cafetaria staff and specials teachers will all have a list of the children with food allergies (and other health issues like diabetes, seizures, etc...) Goodness! Scary, innit??
Her Class teacher, Ms.D, has a lot of experience with kids having food allergies and is comfortable administering an Epi.
I volunteered to help in anyway to bring an awareness to other kids and parents. Prolly sounded like a paranoid parent! Which I was!!

I think I felt a little better after those meetings. Thanks to our Local Allergy Network for Educating me and others like me.
Even though I'm more worried now, I'm glad I have the information!!
I knew what to do, what to expect, what to request, what questions to ask - wouldn't have dreamt of asking them otherwise...
Thanks guys!!

29 pokes later...

Sigh! What a long evening!! And for what? To find out that T1 has a whole slew of allergies again!
T1's home this last week of summer vacation before the hectic back to school life begins for all of us! I was working from home today, with Pup being outta town for work. I wasn't sure if I should leave T2 home with in-laws for the doc appt! I kinda had a familiar hunch that it's gonna be a while before we can get back, and mil and fil may not be able to handle T2 for that long. Esply with T2 already going through a change - transitioning to Pre-K...I wasn't sure how she'd be.
So, I picked up T2 about a quarter to five, gave her some milk, and rushed off to re-visit the almost forgotten allergist's office after 3 years!
Ya, the last time we had T1 tested was when she was about 3 1/2! She was allergic to peanuts then. There were conflicting results in blood vs. skin test for other nuts, so we pretty much stayed off of all nuts, esply after she had reactions a couple of times.
Once last summer after taking a bite of kaju katli (which she has eaten before with no problems)! And again to walnuts - once from contact, and once an accidental ingestion. Fortunately, the amount was very, less and all we needed each time was a bit of Benadryl to do the trick.

With her entering the Public schools next week, and me attending a "back-to-school" night last week with the local FAAN chapter, I started getting anxious! Too much information can be scary, don't you agree?
So, I made an appointment with the allergist right away.
And picked up T2 and reached there just in time earlier today. Seeing a full waiting room at 5.00PM is not a good sign at all! It took an hour just to see the nurse. But, the waiting room had a kewl school-bus-toy that you can sit in and play...So the hour was not bad to kill at all!
It was the next 30 minutes in the patient-room between seeing the nurse and the doc, and the 15 minutes wait after 29 pricks that were the most difficult. Not to mention the time talking to the doc to discuss the results and plan of action.
T1 was very brave when the nurse pricked in one allergen after another. She started itching though...and was not supposed to scratch, of course. So we held hands playing word games to get her mind off as I watched one prick swell up after another, while T2 was drawing away.
So, yeah! We're back to being positive for most Tree nuts (except hazelnuts).
Like I use hazelnuts everyday!
Cashews and Walnuts were huge, so were peanuts and a slew of tree-pollen, dander, mold, weeds, and cat dander.
When T1 found out she was not allergic to dogs, she told me, "I KNEW IT! See I told you?" What? When??? 6 year olds!!
At least it's one less thing to argue about - having a cat is ruled out - Yippee!!

I have now gotta meet the School Nurse and make a Health Plan - as in what to do in case of an exposure!
I've been a bit relaxed over the past few years because most of her nut-allergies were seemingly history.
So, now it's back to worrying about her safety and wellness.

The allergist recommended allergy shots - once a week for 6 weeks, and then once a month for 3-5 years! Say that again?
We're seriously contemplating going to see a doc who practices the BIOSET variation of the NAET technique. Cuz-P had amazing results last year with little D's food allergies. It's expensive, but if it works, it's worth it!

Only time will tell.

Guilt Trip

August 10th, 2008 is a day that has been etched in my mind's calendar. I have been operating on guilt mode since then. You blink for a few seconds and something terrible happens. But all is well that ends well. Really? Then why can’t I stop thinking about it and about how much worse the day could have gotten??

The day started off with excitement to go to a picnic for the entire family organized at work. This is a place with a miniature golf course and other such sporty stuff. Also, they had arranged for kids’ events, which is always a good thing! This place is at a stone’s throw from where we live, yet we’ve never been there in the 8 years that we’ve lived here!
The picnic
Anyways, despite it being a picnic, we ate lunch, fed the kids too – better to take well-fed kids especially when the event starts after their usual lunch hours! So, we arrived there in time, got our tags and walked up to the pavilion. Pup noticed that familiar faces (to him) were missing, so he promptly walked to the crates of beer to help himself with some familiar taste. The girls found some pebbles and started collecting them and arranging them on the picnic tables. I made small talk to some of my colleagues, grabbed some iced-tea and took the girls over to the caricature artist. T1 got hers done early on and went miniature-golfing with daddy, while I waited with T2, who unable to sit in line kept losing her spot. She was more excited to see the artist in action anyways. She was totally mesmerized at the artist’s work! Then the artist suggested I should sit in line and hold her place. Not wanting to miss getting her caricature done after having waited over an hour, I paid heed. Good thing I did, cos it was our turn 15 minutes before she was ready to close shop. We put both caricatures in the car and went to the get some golfing (ok! put-put golf) action. T1 made her own friends and was a few holes ahead of us going around it for the umpteenth time, while T2 stayed with Pup and me. She of course, tried to get the ball close enough to the hole as she could, and then happily picked and dropped the ball into their final targets. Mommy, whose game started off with pars, eventually had to resort to T2’s tactics, while daddy’s game was getting better.
Then, we tried to get a game of volley ball. What “game”? We were just volleying and missing. We gave up after a mere 5 minutes and decided to head back home. It was almost time to leave. 3 quick hours had passed by.
So far so good…

The accident
The batting cages were right outside the volleyball court and T1 wanted to try it. I’ve never been to one of these before and unfortunately didn’t even know how it worked! I decided to sit it out. Seeing T1 in a helmet triggered a set of tantrum tears from T2. Pup was trying to convince her that she’s too little, a few feet away from where I was sitting. I was looking at them wondering if Pup needed help or if I should rather not cut in. Then we heard this terrible scream. Very, very, loud! I turned around to see T1 screaming from the batting cage she had entered. From the pose that she was crying in, I figured she hurt her leg. My mind was not working. I was struggling to open the door to the cage. The 2 seconds that it took to open it seemed like a lifetime. I picked her up and found a bench to sit on while she kept touching her right thigh, screaming.
In those few seconds that I was not looking, she managed to enter a cage that was meant for adults, that even talented players think twice before entering. I couldn’t begin to imagine how badly she must be hurting.
I am glad I have a little bit of my mom’s composure in tough situations. Or, maybe it was because I did not know then that these balls from hell keep coming one after the other. Or that if she had moved forward and not backward after the first ball hit her, she would have been facing a terrifying burst of them. I can’t stop thinking about the extreme possibilities.
With Pup still holding T2, my friend and colleague, B, rushed to get an ice pack. She started to calm down a bit. There was only a small swelling and a big bruise. I was hapy that the swelling wasn’t getting any bigger, meaning that the possibility of a fracture was less. She was even able to stand up and take a step. But B offered to carry her to the car, while Pup was trying to console the still-tantrumming T2. Of course, now she was crying cos akka’s crying. Then, I got a hold of T2 and she thankfully stopped crying as abruptly as she had started. Pup was horrified by this whole thing, because he knew that the balls could have come rushing at her, and he also knew that T1 made one hell of a Godsend move backward after she got hit!
The aftermath
By this time, T1 was braving it much better so we figured we did not have to take her to an ER. When we got home a couple minutes later, she even wanted to walk from the garage! We made an appointment with a Pediatric Urgent Care facility, had time to feed her a quick dinner, and then took her there. Thanks to my in-laws, we were able to leave T2 home. They offered to help finish up her dinner, and she ate and slept too giving them no trouble! Amid all her tantrums, she does come through during critical times, doesn’t she?
After a typical long wait, we got to see the nurse. From the time the nurse left us after taking T1’s vital stats to the time the doc arrived, T1 walked back and forth to the books corner in the waiting room a dozen times. By now, we certainly had a clue as to what the doc was going to say, but we still needed to hear it.
So yes, a few minutes later, she walked in and told us that there is no way it could be a fracture with her walking like that. And added that a few inches above or below would have been mighty bad as it could have hit a bone. I still shudder to think about what could have happened!
She sent us home with a dose of Mortin. That's it!!
T1 slept well and except for a slight swelling with a big purple bruise, she’s all ok! The next morning, she was trying to convince me that she’d be ok at the ice-skating camp! Yeah right!
After-thoughts
So did this really end well? T1 is one lucky girl to have escaped with a minor bruise. Pup and me are mighty thankful for that! But we can’t stop thinking about the incident.

How do we warn and protect our kids from every single danger that lurks?

How do we prepare ourselves for everything possible, without taking our eyes off of them for even a minute?

How can we not feel terribly guilty when something as frightening happens the one minute that we are distracted?

How do we ignore some callous remarks asking to be more careful, because the underlying truth happens to touch a nerve where it hurts?

I don’t know answers to these questions, but what I did learn is that –
T1 has tremendous will-power and strength, and
We owe a THANK-YOU trip to the temple.
Which we did this weekend with big fat Thank you check…

Three Cheers...!

The story starts about a few weeks back on Memorial Day Weekend, when I had to help T1 on a diorama that she had to make as a final project for school. She chose the book, Cam Jansen and the Double Beach Mystery. I YAY-ed her choice cos I'm thinking "Beach" is going to be an easy scene to set up.
We had a fun shopping spree at Michael's and we went berserk buying art materials :)
So, we ended up spending hours on making the diorama, with absolutely no complain whatsoever from T1! She loved every bit of it - the drawing, the cutting, the painting, the pasting, the carving...even though it seemed never-ending! I could see how much she loves art!

So, when my good friend, VG forwarded an email to me about an upcoming painting competition, I registered T1 right away. I really, truly wanted her to have fun.
I did not want her to be completely clueless, so I asked her to think for a few minutes about the topic before painting.

There were two age groups that the kids were competing in, 6-9 and 10-13. The kids were asked to choose one of three topics - Healthy Food, Family Fun or Fashion.
T1 apparently chose family fun.

Sis-S had registered my niece, P for this too. And it was a good catching-up time for the two of us while the girls were painting away to glory :)

When their time was up, we were allowed to peek in and take a look at their paintings. I couldn't help smiling when I saw T1's painting! It was like she'd done a painting of her diorama. She had a picture of mommy and herself playing at the beach! I suppose she was completely clear on what to draw from her recent project.

My niece-P chose "Healthy Food" and painted a beautiful lone apple and a distant pear on a table (covered with a beautiful table cloth), and a couple of pictures hanging on the wall of the room. So realistic!!

On Saturday, Pup called me when I was at the gymnastics class with the girls and told me that T1 won 3rd place! I was really thrilled! Of course, I had "hoped" like every mom does that she win. But I really was not expecting it. She was one of the youngest kids in the crowd (being 6 1/2) and has had no formal training in Art (not counting the stuff they do in school).

A really cool thing is that they had announced the results in a local TV Channel and displayed her painting too. Of course, we have it DVR-ed, cos I knew we were going to be at the Gymnastics class when they were going to make the announcement.
I couldn't wait to get back home and watch it on TV.
Pup didn't tell me anything about the older kids' results. He did not know. My friend, VG had called to congratulate and that's how he knew!
So it was time for double celebration when we saw that my niece rightfully won the first place in the 10-13 age group!

On Sunday, the kids were given a trophy and a gift certificate at a small ceremony!
It was a real proud-mama moment! Strangely, I was happier now than when she got her first trophies for ASHR in Kumon (translates to being above Grade level).

I'm really glad we were able to give her that bit of encouragement for something that she whole-heartedly enjoys!! So, Art Classes, here we come!!

Add new values, Please...?

I just got back home after attending a meeting conducted by our County's School Board. The topic - Health, Safety, and Wellness - Food allergies being the focus. This was more a joint effort by our area's Allergy Network of which I am a member, and the School Board to discuss issues in Public Schools regarding Food Allergies.
It was very informative and reassuring to know about the steps that the School Board has taken to train Teachers, Nurses, Cafetaria workers, Bus-Drivers and even Substitute Teachers. The School Board takes Food Allergies very seriously.
But (there is always a but!), there are some basic rules across the board, and that is not enough to deal with the increasing proportions of children with food allergies.
The Schools primarily worry about allergies from Peanuts and Tree-nuts, as they are the most common allergens. Most people are not aware that an allergy to milk or wheat or eggs is just as much likely to cause an Anaphylactic reaction as an allergy to peanuts. A friend's daughter has had a severe reaction after being touched by another kid who had just eaten pizza (from the cheese).

One of the suggestions in this meeting was from a parent who has had a very good experience from her School including Thoughtful and Considerate Teachers and Staff. She brought about an important point that it is the parents of other kids, and even the kids themselves who need awareness! I never knew the serious ramifications of having an allergy until T1 tested positive to a whole slew of allergens when she was 7 months old.

I have some work to do here too, especially since she goes to Public school this fall. I was actually taking her allergies for granted after she started outgrowing some of them. But recently she broke out in a terrible rash when Pup touched her after eating some walnuts (this despite testing negative for Walnuts)!
She has eaten Cashew-cake (kaju katli) before, but when she had it last year, her throat started itching after just one small bite (my guess - possible contamination with peanuts)! Fortunately, she ate just one small piece and some Benadryl was all she needed to get better.

So the point of my post is to humbly implore the rest of you to add a few more values when raising your kids, some simple things - like "NO SHARING FOOD" in school, "WASHING HANDS THOROUGHLY" after eating (before touching other kids), and "NOT RIDICULING" kids with allergies.
And as parents, if we can be considerate to other children in the class when taking special snacks or party treats, that will be very highly valued!
Simple things, but they can go a long way.
Thank you.

Puppy Birthday!

I mean, Happy Birthday, Pup! I should have published this post yesterday, but turned out I had other things to do!!
Don't ;) yet...
It turned out to be quite a day!
Started out at 7.30 with me calling Pup to wish him. 37! Wasn't it just a couple of years back that we celebrated his 30th? No? Hmm...
Anyways, He answered the phone in a groggy voice from his hotel in NY City. He was in NY for a couple of days meeting with clients. He was just waking up after a long night of Cut-throat Pool with his colleagues! The girls and I took turns wishing him, and then my parents (They are visiting from India for a couple of months).
Fast forward to 2.30PM...Pup called me from LaGuardia to let me know he's getting on an earlier plane and should be home by 4.30 - YAY!!
So I wrapped things up fast at work and headed out to pick up T1 and T2 from school. They were both as excited as I was.
Thanks to my mom, we had some awesome food awaiting us including Rasa-Wangi (an eggplant daal, if you will) and "kan-kan" paayasam (or saboodana kheer), two of Pup's favorites!
We then headed out to my sister, Sis-S's place for the night. More awesome food :)
T2 slept on the way over to Sis-S's house, and T1 was having fun with my nieces, P and A2 (A2 is visiting from India - She deserves a separate post - coming soon!). Seemed like T1 and T2 would not miss us, So we decided to head out to watch a movie. Terrible movie it was! Pup was joking that they could have wrapped the movie in 5 minutes! Seriously!!
Anyways, we got back to Sis-S's place close to midnight and T1 was still up watching a movie. Then, she said that she had something to show me - I thought it might be another card for Pup...Instead, she showed a big bandage on her knee!
Rewind to about 10.00PM. They were returning from the Tennis court, and when stepping on an uneven surface, T1 slipped and fell on her right knee.
Both my girls are delicate darlings (sigh!) and all she needed was the sight of blood to keep her wailing for a really long time! Poor sis-S and bil-K!! She must have scared them out of their wits! Sorry guys!
They brought her home and cleaned up her wound and tied a loose bandage around her knee...Thanks!!
I was quite upset when I saw the bruise...for the timing of it - Being Pup's birthday and also because she has Stanford 10 exams next week (ok, I know she's only a Kindergarten-er, it's not like its the SATs...), but still...its her first one of this kind...
Ok! Who am I kidding? I know the real reason is the guilt! For being selfish and wanting to go out to watch a movie...I seldom take up my sister's offer to baby-sit my Ts, cos I worry too much about things getting jinxed...Irrational Fear? Paranoia? Whatever you want to call it...!

T1's obviously still hurting from the pretty nasty scraping. We took her to her Ped. first thing in the morning, who wanted us to x-ray it just to be sure her knee is OK! Which we did. She's mostly ok now...with some Motrin to help reduce the pain...

Anyways, I'm sure it was definitely not how Pup expected his birthday would turn out to be! Sorry Hon! I'll make it up to you...I will take care of the laundry this weekend ;)

President's Day

Today is a Holiday for most folks around here to celebrate the birthday of President George Washington. I've taken the day off. I'm so glad I did because I have more time to work with T1 on a Project. Yeah, you heard it right! My dear Kindergartener's first real "graded" project! We have to (I mean, "she" has to) do a report on President Ford. This includes a chart about Ford, with pictures and some key facts. She also has to give a speech about him for a couple of minutes!
Over the past couple of weeks, I've been talking to her about Ford.
I am not sure she really understands what "pardon" is, let alone the infamous Nixon pardon. She is mostly interested in finding more about the crimes behind the Watergate Scandal! Now, how do you explain something so intense to a six year old?
Once I somehow overcame that, she was curious about his death! "Is he dead?" she asked. Then came "How did he die? Was he shot?"...
Apparently, the entire class seems to be interested in just that! Some of the kids gave their presentation last week. The most popular question from the cute and curious 5 and 6 year old audience was about how and when each President died :)
She has it in her head that all dead Presidents were shot!
Becoming a President is now off of her list of careers now :)
As much fun as it has been to spend time with her to work on this report, I feel it is a lot to expect from these little kids! It's been a challenge to thrust all of this information to her and have her write it (the report has to be pencil-written by the kids).
I dread to think what middle and high school will be like!!

I’m an only child – not!

T1 is in Kindergarten and they have this thing called “Star of the week”, where every kids gets a week to be the star of the class.
Aka more work for mommy!
We had to make a chart about her (she actually did a lot of the writing/drawing herself).
Dad printed a couple of photos to add to the chart (one of all 4 of us, and one of t1 and t2).
Then every day of the week there is a special activity –
Monday – she got to wear whatever she liked (no uniform).
Tuesday – she got to pick a friend to eat lunch with (she made us cry when she told us about her choice – she pick this super-hyper kid who always gets himself into trouble with the law...i mean..teacher! The reason she picked him was cos he has the least friends and she wanted to make him feel nice)! Is she really six years old?
Wednesday – special snack of her choice (we have to send in). Being a bad-weather day today, we moved it to Friday.
Thursday – she can bring a movie/game to share (we decided to go with “A bug’s life”)

And, we had to send 4 artifacts about her – Birth bracelet from the hospital, 0-1yr picture frame (will post this sometime), Kumon trophy (yeah! me got sucked into Kumon), and her ice-skating camp shirt.

So Anyways…When I helped her carry the chart and artifacts to her class on Monday, her teacher shyly asked who the little girl in the picture is!
When I told her she is T1’s little sis, she was surprised!! She had no idea that T1 has a sister!
She thought all along that T1’s an only-child.
At first I thought that was hilarious!
But, this has been bothering me all week….
How can this be?
T1 is a big chatterer. She can talk for hours about everything or nothing and not be tired – like most 6 year olds!
I’m completely staggered that she has never once mentioned T2 to her teacher!
It’s a given that there is some built-up sibling rivalry, but is it bad?

T1’s showing great signs of accepting her little sis. There are good and not-so-good moments, but overall they are a good pair. Or so I hope!
She’s been an awesome helper of late, esply in the crazy morning hours.
She helps wake T2 up (which has to be done very tactfully), we do NOT want T2 waking up on the wrong side of the bed!
She sets T2’s brush and paste ready when she does hers, they SO lovingly hug each other when watching a movie, she patiently teaches her the alphabet and numbers, and so much else!
Does she do all that to make us think she’s OK about T2?

I know deep down she cares for her – right?

She is a typical child who needs a sibling! She even asks us for another one!
(Which is not happening!)

I hope we are doing the right things to make them bond unconditionally like we want them to!
I suppose we should simply wait this one out, but not without a LOT of hard work from our side!